Category: Relationship with Others

5 Things That Ruin Marriages

There’s no doubt that the divorce rate around the world continues to grow and it shows no sign of slowing down.
You find a couple seemingly falls in love, gets married and then before you know it, their marriage is ruined and they are filing for divorce.


So what are the things that ruin marriages? Below are at least 5 major factors that can destroy a marriage.

This is always a big issue in a marriage. Maybe the husband isn’t earning as much as his wife and so there’s tension in the home.
Or perhaps there are disagreements on how to budget and spend the money in the home.
Another reason could be that both husband and wife are not earning enough income and so it’s difficult to meet the financial requirements in the home.
Couples are therefore bound to fight and even divorce if measures are not taken to address the financial aspect of a marriage.
The Bible however teaches us that we should be good stewards of all that God gives us and therefore this includes how we use our money. God expects us to spend our money wisely and righteously.
Furthermore, we are not to worry about money (Matthew 6:25-34) – but we should learn to trust in God that He will supply all our needs (Philippians 4:19).
Therefore in a marriage – a couple shouldn’t focus on fighting each other over money – but the couple should collectively look towards being good stewards of what they have and to trust that God will provide increase and supply every need of the family.

Have you ever had those fights with your spouse where something you did many years ago which you thought was long forgiven and forgotten is brought back in the fight – and you’re like “Hey – I thought that issue was long forgiven & forgotten”
Well – unforgiveness – if not properly dealt with- it grows like a cancer and it festers bitterness, resentment and an underlying rage which may eventually destroy a marriage.
So it’s important that when a couple fights, that they attempt to quickly and amicably resolve an issue as soon as possible.
The Bible says that we should not allow the sun to go down whilst we are still angry (Ephesians 4:26). In other words – try not to go to bed without amicably resolving a problem with your spouse.

Poor communication or lack of transparency will undoubtedly lead to lack of trust within the relationship.
The Bible encourages us to be honest and to speak the truth in love. Hiding the truth is a form of deception but speaking the truth encourages trust between spouses.
Where there is dishonesty there is lack of trust, and where there is lack of trust, a marriage may end up in divorce.

Adultery is clearly wrong and it destroys the trust of a spouse. The Bible teaches that if you marry someone – it is for life and you are to remain faithful to your partner till death do you part.
Biblically, marriage is more than just a human contract. It is the joining of a man and woman in order to become one flesh.
Adultery destroys trust, creates unforgiveness and it can destroy a marriage.

A marriage can be ruined because spouses do not understand or fulfill their God given spousal roles in the home.
The Bible teaches that the husband is the head and his roles is to love, provide, lead, nourish & protect his wife just as Christ does the same for the Church (Ephesians 5:22-31).
The wife is to respect & submit to her husband as the church submits to Christ (Ephesians 5:22-24,33). The wife should also be like the wife mentioned in Proverbs 31 in that she is excellent, respectful to her husband, industrious and manages the home.

So it’s important to note that every marriage goes through testing. The important thing as a couple is to learn HOW to resolve problems together and to put God at the centre of the relationship.


How Do We Deal With Racism?

What is racism and how do we deal with racism?
If you think about it – nobody who was born, asked to be born black, white or brown. None of us asked to be born African, Caucasian, Jewish or Arab. Neither did we ask to be born within a specific nation of our own choosing and to be born at a specific year of our own choice.
When we were born – we were born – and we had no choice or control pertaining to which family we were going to be born in and which ethnicity we would be a part of.

So, do black lives matter? Do white lives matter? Or – do all lives matter?
What is the best viewpoint on the matter of racism?

In order to understand the monster called racism we need to view this issue purely from a spiritual or Biblical viewpoint.


Biblical Viewpoint of Races
From a Biblical viewpoint, there is just ONE race among mankind – the HUMAN RACE. Therefore in God’s eyes there is no other race of people but the human race.
The entire human race came from ONE couple – Adam & Eve (Genesis 1, Genesis 2).
Both Adam & Eve could neither be classified as being African, Caucasian or even Asian. However every human being who lives and has lived on the earth has directly and biologically come from Adam & Eve.
Being African, Caucasian, Indian, Asian, Arab, or Jewish are not classifications of different races but they are different ethnicities of the human race.
All human beings have been created in the image of God regardless of ethnicity (Genesis 1:26-27).
All human beings are loved the same by God regardless of ethnicity such that His redemption plan includes the entire human race (John 3:16).
God is impartial. He does not show favoritism to anybody regardless of their ethnicity. God sees all people regardless of their ethnicity as being the same hence His impartiality (Romans 2:11).


Worldly / Secular Viewpoint of Races
Unfortunately the secular worldview is to subdivide people according to their ethnic background and this is where the demon of racism begins to appear.
These subdivisions have created false philosophies, false opinions, false assumptions & false conclusions that certain “races” or ethnic groups are better than others. This perception of one ethnic group being superior or better than another is the root, cause & definition of racism.
The worldly viewpoint sees certain ethnic groups of people as being more superior to others.
The worldly viewpoint sees certain ethnic groups of people as being more evolved than others.
The worldly viewpoint sees certain ethnic groups of people as being more pure blooded than others.
This is the ugly face of racism which has resulted in strife, wars, unfairness, disputes and destruction of lives, families and society.
The spirit of racism doesn’t embrace people’s differences – it loathes them.

Racism first begins in the mind and then reveals itself through a spirit of partiality as one negatively treats others who have a different ethnic background.


How Do We Deal With Racism?
The truth is this: It’s not only white people who are racist. Even black people can be racist. Anybody can be a racist. The issue of prejudice begins inside individual hearts and then like a cancer spreads into a grouping of people fighting against another group.
Racism therefore must be dealt with at mind level, starting with how we individually perceive people who are of a different ethnic background.

Racism can be dealt with through perceiving & applying the following life applications:

1. Every human being originated from ONE couple – Adam and Eve. Therefore there is only ONE race – that is the HUMAN race
2. All human beings are made in the image of God. Therefore there is no human being who is superior to another human being
3. God loves us all the same. He is does not show favoritism. Therefore when we have a racial attitude towards others then we are portraying an evil attitude towards someone who God loves and whom God created in His own image.
4. Nobody had a choice or any control into which ethnic background they would be born in or become a part of. Our birth wasn’t our choice – but it was God’s choice. Therefore no one has any right to prejudice somebody based on the colour of their skin.
5. As people we need to learn to love one another and to walk in love. Whatever we do should be under the motivation of love for God and love for our fellow man (1 Corinthians 13:1-13).

John 13:34
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.

How Can We Spread The Gospel?

How can we spread the gospel of Jesus Christ? What ways or what methods can we use to spread the gospel that God loves mankind so much that Jesus Christ died on the cross to pay for sins of the whole world so that we may have eternal life and fellowship with God (John 3:16).
The word “gospel” means good news. Evangelism is the proclamation of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Therefore we have a mandate to spread the good news to many unbelievers concerning God’s saving grace (Ephesians 2:8,9).
In Matthew 28:19-20 Jesus says “Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age”.
We therefore have been given the great commission to spread the gospel and make disciples of all nations.

Below are a list of ways or methods by which we can spread the gospel of Jesus Christ to unbelievers:

1. Street Evangelism
Street evangelism involves sharing the gospel to the public or strangers in the streets or neighbourhoods. For example, through personal soul-winning you can initiate conversations with a stranger in the street by asking: “Where do you think you will go when you die?”
Another option in street evangelism is to preach the gospel in the streets at a specific location in a public area like the town park where people are most likely to sit or stop to listen.

2. Friendship Evangelism
We all have people whom we associate with who are unbelievers. These unbelievers could be friends, workmates or relatives.
We can share the gospel with people whom we see frequently and whom we know to be non-christians.

3. Door to Door
This refers to selecting a neighbourhood and going from house to house and explaining the gospel to people in their homes.

4. Social Media & Internet
We can use social media to spread the gospel. Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, a website and the like can all be used to the glory of God. These internet based facilities can help you reach a wide variety of people across the world and to spread the gospel.

5. Print Media
You can use gospel tracts, Christian booklets, Christian books, Bibles to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ. Giving someone something to go home and read that explains the gospel helps a person.

6. Television, Radio & Entertainment
Sketch-boards, puppets, movies, plays, music and television are other methods of evangelism.


Below are a few Bible verses that encourage us to spread the gospel and evangelise:

2 Timothy 4:5 NKJV
But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.

Ephesians 4:11-12 NKJV
And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ

Mark 16:15 NKJV
And He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature.

2 Timothy 3:16 NKJV
All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness

2 Timothy 4:2 NKJV
Preach the word! Be ready in season and out of season. Convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching.

Matthew 28:19 NKJV
Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit

Matthew 5:16 NKJV
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.



Perhaps you are reading this article and you have not given your life to Jesus Christ. Or perhaps you are not sure whether you are a Christian or not.
Salvation is FREE. Jesus Christ paid for our sins on the cross so that we may have eternal life (John 3:16). Therefore when we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord & Saviour it is not because of our own personal effort but we become Christians by the grace of God (Ephesians 2:8,9).

1. ACKNOWLEDGE: “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). “God be merciful to me a sinner” (Luke 18:13).
You must acknowledge that you are a sinner and that you therefore need Jesus in your life.

2. REPENT: “Unless you repent you will all likewise perish” (Luke 13:3), “Repent therefore and be converted that your sins may be blotted out” (Acts 3:19)
Repenting means: to change your mind; a sincere turning away, in heart, mind and action;
Therefore God wants you to repent of sinful values and of sinful living. God wants you to decide to
follow Him and to make Jesus the Lord of your life.

3. CONFESSION: “If we confess our sins. He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). “That if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9)
God is a forgiving God. God will forgive any sin that you have done because Jesus died for ALL your sins and to set you free from the bondage of all types of sin in your life.

4. BELIEVE: “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life” (John 3:16).
You must believe that ONLY Jesus can save you and restore your relationship with God. You must believe that Jesus is the ONLY way by which you can have everlasting life and escape from eternal separation from God. You must believe that Jesus died on the cross for you and resurrected from the grave.
“He came to His own, and His own did not receive him, But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, even to those who believe in His name” (John 1:11-12)
By faith, You must receive Jesus as Your Lord & Savior and therefore; you become a child of God; you become born again; you become a Christian; you restore your broken relationship with God


Why Not Make Your Eternal Decision NOW?

We become born again Christians by GRACE through FAITH or TOTAL TRUST in Jesus Christ as our Lord & Savior (Galatians 3:26) & (Ephesians 2:8,9). Salvation is a FREE gift received through FAITH in Christ.

PLEASE NOTE: You can choose to pray in your own words. This prayer is a sample prayer and it is only an EXPRESSION of your faith, belief & trust in Jesus. Salvation is by GRACE through FAITH or BELIEVING in Christ Jesus as your Lord & Saviour.

“Lord Jesus, I thank You for Your love. I thank You that You died on the cross for me and resurrected so that I may have life through You.
I confess Lord that I have sinned against You and today I ask You to forgive me of all of my sins, past present and future.
I repent of all of my sins and I ask You to cleanse me Jesus.
Thank You for forgiving my sins.
From this moment, come into my life Lord Jesus & take full control of my life. I want to follow You Jesus and I want to follow Your ways. Save me and from today, make me the person You want me to be.
I receive You Lord Jesus right now by faith. I trust You as my Lord and Savior – Amen”

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Why Should I Forgive Others?

We have all been hurt or offended by somebody in our lives. You may have been in situations where people have deliberately done or spoken bad things against you. You were right and he/she was wrong. You didn’t deserve to be offended or hurt by that person; But the question is, when somebody offends us, what should we do? How should you feel towards the person who has offended you? What would Jesus do if He were in YOUR position? What does Jesus SAY you should do?

Mark 11:25-26 NKJV
“And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”

Unforgiveness is defined as: a grudge against someone who has offended you; not having the compassion to forgive; a resentful attitude that spews out all types of evil
Unforgiveness according to Jesus is a sin. No matter how we have been hurt or offended by somebody, it is a CHOICE whether to FORGIVE or to NOT FORGIVE.
Jesus prefers and teaches that you should CHOOSE to FORGIVE anyone who has offended or hurt you in any form.

Matthew 18:21-22 NKJV
Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.

How often should you forgive an offence against you?
Jesus teaches that there should be no limit to your ability to forgive your offenders. It’s hard I know. It’s not easy. But Jesus being crucified on the cross for our sins was not easy too. Whilst hanging in terrible pain on the cross, Jesus prayed for us to the Father in Heaven: “Father, FORGIVE THEM, for they do not know what they do”Luke 23:34 NKJV

When you understand the sacrifice that Jesus made for YOU individually; and when you understand that even though YOU too are not perfect, Jesus was crucified for YOU and your sins, then why would you not want to forgive somebody else whom Jesus also died on the cross for?

1 Corinthians 13:5 NIV
… (LOVE) is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Indeed it is a hurtful thing when we are offended, however God does not expect us to remain hurt & unforgiving towards others. He expects us to move past the hurt by allowing the love and peace of God to rule our hearts & minds.

Luke 11:2-4 NLT
Jesus said, “This is how you should pray: … as we forgive those who sin against us.”

To Forgive means to: Stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake.; To excuse for a fault or an offense; pardon

Nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes. Therefore, we all need forgiveness. Romans 3:23 says “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,”
Jesus therefore taught that as we pray to the Father, we must talk to God about those who have offended us.
Is it okay to tell God all the pain that you feel concerning those who have hurt you? Yes it’s okay!
Is it okay to pray to the Lord about our offenders? Yes it’s okay! However as we pray to God about our offenders, we must not be hateful towards them, but rather Jesus guides us as to how we should pray pertaining to those who sin against us. Jesus says that as we pray, we must ultimately forgive our offenders; we must tell God that we forgive those who have hurt us and we must make the decision to forgive.

Matthew 6:14-15 NKJV
“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

If we expect God to forgive us, then we too must also forgive those who hurt or offend us. When we forgive others we are actually freeing ourselves from the bondage of hate, resentment and anger. Whenever we operate in hate, resentment and anger we give the devil a foothold and we are not able to behave and respond according to God’s will and character.
The devil’s deception is that if we do not forgive those who offend us, we are perhaps hurting the offender by choosing not to forgive them. The truth is, in God’s eyes, we are hurting ourselves more than we hurt the offender if we do not forgive.
When we do not forgive others, neither will God forgive us.

Matthew 7:12 NKJV
Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.

Because we all make mistakes, and we all at some point in life will offend or hurt somebody else’s feelings, we then must be able to forgive others if we also expect to be forgiven by other people when we make a mistake.
Why should i forgive others? God forgave you. Forgiveness heals you. Forgiveness is an expression of the love of God in your life.
TODAY, if you have anyone whom you have not forgiven – make a CHOICE to forgive them NOW.


6 Men That Single Women Should Avoid

Are you dating? Are you considering marriage?
Choosing a spouse is the third most important decision you will ever make. The first most important decision in your life is becoming a born again Christian and the second is choosing the right church.

Therefore if you’re single and if you’re looking for the right person to live with for the rest of your life, what warning signs should you look for before you consider a serious relationship with a man?

Below are a 6 types of men that single women should avoid

(1) An Unbeliever
2 Corinthians 6:14-15Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? 15 And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?
The Bible is clear that in the context of binding relationships such as marriage, a Christian does not have anything in common with a non-Christian or unbeliever. A marriage can last when both partners have God involved in their individual lives and are willing to involve God to be at the centre of their marriage.
Therefore it’s important for single women to pray to God to discover a Christian man who genuinely loves the Lord.

(2) A Man Who Dislikes Children
There are millions of single mothers around the world who raise their children alone because many men have abandoned the responsibility of fatherhood. Why do men abandon fatherhood? Most of them are ill-equipped, lack responsibility and dislike children. A man who loves children will not abandon the kids whom he has brought into the world irrespective of the sexual choices he has made.
Proverbs 13:22A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children, But the wealth of the sinner is stored up for the righteous.
It’s important for a single woman to find out if her man is somebody who genuinely loves children and will not dump her the moment she becomes pregnant.

(3) A Violent & Abusive Man
If a man is abusive and violent before you get married – it’s most likely that such a man will continue this abuse in the marriage. Single women should avoid getting involved with men who are violent and abusive. Instead they should seek men who will nourish and cherish them.
Ephesians 5:28-29So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.

(4) A Man Without A Plan
A woman generally looks for security within a man. When a man has no direction or purpose in his life it could be a problem in the long run. God’s principle in a marriage is that the husband is to lead the home and if a husband has no vision or plan, he will fail to lead his family.
Ephesians 5:23For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.

(5) An Unfaithful Man
Unfaithfulness in a relationship will lead to anger, pain, mistrust and ultimately a broken relationship.
Unfaithfulness is always a warning sign that a woman should heed before she gets married as adultery is the cause of many broken marriages around the world.
Hebrews 13:4Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.
Fornication is when an unmarried person is sexually active. Adultery is when a married person is sexually active with another person who is not his spouse.
God does not agree with fornication and adultery because these practices destroy the faithfulness of a person and whilst it may appear pleasurable to engage in sex outside of marriage, the effects are negative and damaging to long term relationships.

(6) A Man Who Abuses Substances
Out of the abuse of drugs and alcohol can come many relationship issues: Physical abuse, financial issues, communication breakdown; sexual & infidelity issues and also spiritual issues. Therefore a man who is addicted to drugs or alcohol will end up causing these kind of issues in a relationship.
Ephesians 5:18And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit,


The best man that single women can find, is a godly man who loves God and has genuine Christian values.
Are you looking for the right husband? Pray and seek the mind of God and search His word regarding the qualities of a godly person.

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