8 Signs of a Narcissist
What are the traits or characteristics of a narcissist? How do you know if you’re dealing with a narcissist?
Narcissism is a psychological term used to describe the condition where a person has an abnormal and frequent preoccupation with himself / herself.
The root sin of narcissistic behaviour is the sin of pride and conceitedness. So a narcissist is one who lacks humility or the ability to think of others as being more significant / important than himself.
Philippians 2:3-4 says: Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
8 Traits of a Narcissist
1. Superiority complex or grandiose sense of self-importance
Narcissists overtly or covertly believe that they are better than everyone else. They project a mindset and behavior of entitlement. Therefore their decisions, opinions, actions or expectations must be regarded far above the views of others.
2. Narcissists feel the need to always win or have the last word
Whether it be a debate or argument, the narcissist always needs to win the discussion. A narcissist always feels the need to always be right; they project the mindset that they cannot be wrong; they cannot humbly accept defeat.
3. A narcissist cannot take “No!” for an answer
The narcissist does not take criticism very well. They hate rejection and opposition. So especially if the narcissist is a leader – narcissist leaders need to surround themselves with people who will always agree with them – or “yes men”.
Narcissists need people who will validate their superiority complex and so they will shun people who disagree, scrutinize or oppose them.
4. Manipulation & control is the narcissist modus operandi
Narcissists are skillful manipulators. They always need to be in control. They are good at reading people’s weaknesses because their intention is to exploit those weaknesses. They dislike opposition of any kind and therefore a narcissist will lie, exploit or manipulate people, or a situation to get what they want. In the mind of a narcissist – the end justifies the means.
5. Narcissists have difficulty with expressing authentic feelings
A narcissist has difficulty expressing genuine love or empathy for others. Any kind of “love” or false humility from a narcissist will usually or eventually have strings attached to it. Inwardly narcissists will exploit others without guilt, shame or remorse in order to get what they really want.
6. Narcissists have self-esteem issues
Deep down narcissists have feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem. They desire praise, admiration and validation in order to feel important. They are attention seekers and so their sense of superiority is sustained by the attention they receive. Therefore their narcissism is motivated by deep internal feelings and emotions of poor self-esteem and insecurities.
7. Narcissists have dangerous defense mechanisms
Since narcissists are exploiters and manipulators, they will always use various defense mechanisms to defend themselves from perceived enemies or opposition.
Narcissists tend to lie, gaslight, blame or deflect even when it is proven that they are blatantly wrong. They will also project their own personal faults and failures on others.
8. Narcissists reflect arrogant and conceited behaviour
They frequently demean, intimidate, bully or belittle others in order to make themselves feel superior or better than other people. They are in love with their own sense of success and achievements. Their behaviours are fueled by pride.
The issue of narcissism or Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a growing problem. The Bible explains that in the last days narcissism will be a major problem in our world.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 says: But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.
All sin in the world is rooted in pride and the desire to pursue one’s own selfish agendas. We live in a generation that is embracing a spirit of narcissism which is further fueled by many things including social media negatives and a culture of self-gratification.
Narcissism is a dangerous trait that corrupts an entire society and generation. It is also contagious. Narcissism is something we should definitely avoid in our own personal life. Instead we must learn to clothe ourselves in humility.