Dealing with Uncontrolled Anger

Anger is such a strong emotion, which if not controlled, can lead to detrimental results.
It can be very difficult to reason, negotiate or have a decent conversation with a person whilst they are angry. This is because when anger is not controlled, it causes that angry person to be:

  1. Unfocused on the true / root causes of the issues that they are angry about
  2. An angry person often does not think clearly, calmly and logically because his/her emotions have taken over and therefore this will result in irrational and regrettable actions.
  3. Uncontrolled anger generally does not lead to acts of righteousness but leads to self-destructive behavior.
  4. If not dealt with, anger can lead to resentment, jealousy, bitterness, depression, disobedience and the like.

Anger can be defined as: A strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility.

Genesis 4:6-7 NKJV
So the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.”

  • Cain was a person who had a short temper and he had a problem controlling his anger. When God rejected Cain’s offering, and instead accepted Abel’s offering, Cain’s initial and dominant response was that of anger. He was so angry that it showed in his body language and God had to address Cain about his anger issues and how his anger would allow sin to rule over him.
  • In his anger, Cain was not focused on dealing with and correcting the root cause of the problem, which was that he failed to give an offering honorable to God. He should have asked for God’s forgiveness and made amends to next time honour God properly. God said to Cain in Genesis 4:7 “If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.” – Therefore God wanted Cain to focus on doing well; on doing the right thing; instead of allowing his uncontrolled anger to cause him to sin.
  • Uncontrolled anger does not lead to repentance. When God corrected him, Cain did not repent, however his anger continued against his brother Abel and also against God. Cain’s anger ultimately caused him to have an argument with Abel which resulted in him killing Abel. (Genesis 4:8,9). Therefore Cain did not heed God’s advice that he must not let sin rule over him.
  • When you cannot control your anger, you can fail to respect others. When God asked Cain where his brother Abel was, Cain responded disrespectfully to God in his tone and he also lied to God by saying that he did not know where Abel was, even though he had just killed his brother. (Genesis 4:9)

How to Deal with Anger

James 1:19-20 NKJV
So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

  1. God’s word encourages us to be slow to anger. In other words, we must not be short-tempered; we must be patient; we must not easily allow anger to rule our thoughts and actions.
  2. We must not be angry for a very long time because it will allow sin to rule (Ephesians 4:26,27 – “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.)
  3. We must deal with anger by forgiving others and also by forgiving ourselves. (Ephesians 4:31-32 – Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.)
  4. We must deal with anger by allowing the Holy Spirit to dwell in us and teach us to overcome wrath and anger. One of the fruit of the Holy Spirit is SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:19-23)

Proverbs 16:32 NKJV
He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, And he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.

TODAY. Remember that God does not want anger to rule over us – but He wants us to rule over anger.

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